Temptation

Today was a day of temptation. It was a challenge to set my mind to workout mode and actually get it done.

It started out by playing outside with my son in his little kiddie pool, napping on the couch with him, then more pool time outside. My mom came home from the store with Chocolate Creme Twinkies. I swear the devil himself created those. I didn't eat one, but I wanted to. Needless to say, I didn't get my workout in early in the day like I had wanted.

Then it was time to drop my son off with his dad. Still the worst feeling ever. I stopped for a Coke Slurpee on the way home so I wouldn't be tempted to stop for a cheeseburger and fries. My good friend called me and asked me to come over and hang out. Hanging out with this friend means great conversation and a double bottle of Moscato wine. lol. Very tempting! I soooo wanted to go hang out but I knew if I did I wouldn't be home until late tonight and I would be skipping my day 4 workout. As hard as it was, I resisted and went home. I knew if I got in the habit of skipping days to hang out, my entire routine would be off and I might as well quit now. Thankfully my friend understood. =)

Now, just because I declined this invitation doesn't mean I ran straight home and did my workout. I had no motivation to pop in that dvd and do my circuit workout. I knew it was going to be hard and that my arms and legs would hurt afterward. (It's hard to even type right now - even worse when my 'd' button isn't working properly!) I was in a funk when I got home and spent most of the night addicted to the show Extreme Couponing on TLC. On a side note, why does anyone need 1,000 tubes of toothpaste at one time? Wow.

So, 8:00pm hit, I hadn't worked out and all I wanted to do was continue sitting on my butt and watching TV. What did I do?? I laced up my sneakers and did my circuit workout, of course! It was a struggle but I did it. I am very proud of myself! I didn't give in to temptation or my laziness. I got off my butt and stuck to my program! Yay me!

My mom looked into a Senior Center near our house today. They have an indoor pool and since she has back and leg issues she wants to try water aerobics since it's less stressful on the body. They have a Aqua Zumba class! You don't have to be over 50 to go either! Anyone over 21 can enroll. It runs on Tuesdays and Thursdays from July 11th though August 6th, so that's what I'll be doing. It sounds like fun - zumba and pool time!

So that's my day 4. This weekend will be busy. I have to make sure I get my workout in early tomorrow and Friday since I have plans in the evening. No excuses!

Till tomorrow... (I wish I had that bottle of wine right now!)

Feel The Burn!

Oooh... I'm feeling it today!

I woke up this morning and was sore, but not as sore as I thought I would be. As long as I was moving I felt ok. It's only when I sat for a while and tried to get going again that I really felt it. My goal today was to do my day 3 workout and make a zumba class at 7:30 tonight. That didn't happen. I ended up going grocery shopping with my mom, son and cousin instead. At least I didn't lay around in bed all day! I got a pretty good arm workout while lugging a pretty big, plastic kiddie pool around Walmart while my mom looked for a car windshield shade (which we had already passed)! lol!

But, I did do my day 3 workout! It was my second day of cardio and this time I tried the yoga! I wasn't able to do it all but at least I tried! I did a revised version of the plank that I was taught by a personal trainer last year (when I signed up at the gym and got a free session but never went back for the other 5 I got). Instead of lifting my body on my hands and toes and staying straight, I pushed myself up on my elbows and toes. And I did the downward and upward dogs. It felt good stretching my back like that!

I was already tired of the music and the guy talking on the video so I turned the TV down and turned my iPod on shuffle. The second song that came on - "What I Got" by Sublime. My brother and I shared a love for Sublime, especially that album. We used to play it and sign along when we were in the car together. It was like he visited me to let me know that he's on my side.... at least I choose to believe that he sent me that song for a reason.

I realized today that I had somehow forgotten how to do jumping jacks. I used to be able to do them but I can't anymore. I feel retarded. I'm jumping up and down and waving my arms back and forth, but it's no where near what a jumping jack is supposed to look like. Oh well... I really don't care. That's one good thing about doing these workouts at home. You don't have to worry about feeling stupid or looking like you just rolled out of bed. I wish that workout videos had fat people on them instead of these in-shape, ripped people that aren't even breaking a sweat by the end of the workout. Seriously! I would rather have the trainer standing up front showing the moves and some fat folks in the back that are all red and huffing and puffing like I am! This was me a few minutes after my workout... all red, dying of heat and sweaty! I really felt the burn today!

I do need one more thing before my next cardio workout. I need a picture to use as a target during the kicking and punching portions. I already know whose picture I want I just need to print it. For those of you that know my current situation... the name starts with C. haahaa! I'm going to tape it to the closet door and focus on it while doing all my jabs, uppercuts and body shots! I love it! I'm sure I'll get to a whole new level of punching by using this picture as a target! LOL!

That's all for now. I'm glad day 3 is over and I'm looking forward to finishing my first week. I think I want to weigh in once a week and update how much I've lost. I don't want to weigh in every day cause I don't want that to be my main focus. And I don't want to be discouraged when I don't lose weight. I want to really focus on the working out aspect this week then focus on my eating habits next week, while continuing to workout.

Till tomorrow... (My legs are on fire and I love it!!!)

Snap, Crackle, Pop

That's what my body sounded like when I was doing my day 2 workout - circuit. The circuit workout was much harder than the cardio workout. The cardio is more running, kicking, punching. The circuit is all about lifting weights, push ups, lunges, and stretching.

In short... it kicked my butt.

I used the resistance band that came with the program. You put one foot, or two depending on how tight and difficult you want it to be, on the band and use it like weights. I guess it gives you a harder workout than if you just use weights. (See picture to the left - obviously that's not me in the picture - if I had her body I would not be writing this blog.)

They make you do all kinds of things with this band. My arms are going to be killing me tomorrow. I think I'll be switching to light weights next time.

We also did lots of push ups. I had to cheat and put my knees on the ground. And I cheated even more and put a pillow under my knees so I wouldn't hurt myself on the tile. Even the "cheater" push ups are hard!

When it got to doing lunges... I could only do half of them. My knees were cracking all over the place! Makes me feel so old! But I was very proud that I kept up with all the other parts of the video! It was hard and I really tried my best to get a good workout. My legs were very tired by the end.

Then it has you doing something called chair dips. Oh hell no! I didn't even attempt this insanity! I knew I'd either hurt myself with the actual exercise or fall and crack my head open on the tile. Either one of those would not be a good result. So I skipped this activity.

But seriously, by the end of this circuit workout... I was feeling it. My back is tired. I'm hoping it's not going to hurt tomorrow. My arms feel week, which I'm sure is a good thing. And my legs are noodles. I do have one minor injury. My neck hurts. Not sure if it's a workout related injury or if I just slept on it weird, but it's tight and I can't turn it all the way. It impacts the way I hold my head when I do some of these exercises so I hope I'm not making it worse as I do them. I am finding that I'm focusing on my posture more than I used to. I'm a sloucher, always have been. But even while sitting and writing this blog I've noticed three or four times that I was slouching and I made myself sit up straight. It makes my back feel stronger.

On another note, it's difficult working out with a very curious 2 year old. I put on his Barney video in the living room in the hopes he'd stay entertained while I worked out in the bedroom. Half way through he came in and wanted to steal my resistance band. Then he put the pillow on the floor and pretended to do push ups with me. It was really cute.

Anyway - Day 2 workout is complete! Tomorrow the real challenge begins.... I'm going to really be hurting tomorrow but I know I have to work through the pain anyway.

By the way, thanks for everyone's support! I know I haven't been responding to all the comments on this blog or on facebook, but I have been reading them all. I'm thankful for all the support I have received since starting this blog. I'm grateful to all my friends and family for your advice and for giving me the internal strength and motivation I needed to start and to continue. =) You guys are all awesome!

Time for some Advil...
Until tomorrow...

Day 1 - DONE!

I did it! I started my workout program today! WOOHOO! I said I was going to do it and I stuck with it! YAY ME!

I woke up, had a cheese stick to get me going, and put in the dvd. I learned three things today...

#1: I need a new dvd player. I borrowed one from my dad which works just fine. However, I need the remote for it to move over to the Circuit video, which is what I was supposed to do today. Since I couldn't get over to the circuit video I just did the cardio video. I'm sure it doesn't matter which one I do first but I have to do the circuit tomorrow which means I'll need a dvd player with a remote! I'll be making a trip to my house today and stealing the one that's in the bedroom. lol.

#2: Yoga and I just don't mix. The cardio video started with a warm-up/stretching section. It went well, I was able to do all the moves at my own level. Then it moved into a "Power Yoga" section. I tried. I borrowed a yoga mat that I found at my parents house. I'm not sure who it belongs to... it's either one of my sister's old mats or it used to be my brothers. Either way, I'm using it now. The video started with "planks." Yeah... no. Then it moved into "downward dog" and some other things. I couldn't hang with all that, so I did my own stretching moves. It's hard doing it on tile floor though. My knees and butt hurt sitting on the floor, even with the mat. I feel like I need on of those thick gymnastic mats that we used un elementary school when they taught us tumbling!

#3: Two words..... sports bra. Enough said.

The rest of the video went well. I did some running, kicking, punching. I sweated, which is a good thing I guess. Then they did a cool-down/stretching section at the end, and I was done. It went into an Ab burner section, but I wasn't going to attempt that today. I'm just proud that I did the stuff I did! I didn't want to get on that tile floor, with that tiny little mat under me and hurt my back trying to do crunches!

So, I decided that I may need to supplement this video with some other classes. Since I am a member of Gold's Gym, I looked up the class schedule for this week. I plan to hit the Tuesday Zumba class at 7:30pm, the Thursday Aqua Fitness class at 9am, and maybe another Zumba class on Friday at 10am. I'm also enrolling my son in Baby and Me swim lessons so I'm hoping to get some exercise during that also.

I'll update again tomorrow after Day 2 and the first circuit video. In that video I'm supposed to use the resistance band that came with it. Fun! I'm also going swimming with a friend in the morning (for fun, not working out) and Dylan's first swim class will be tomorrow afternoon. Busy day... but I'll find time for my Power 90 workout and a blog update!

Till tomorrow.... =)

45 Minutes...

What's 45 minutes compared to the rest of my day? Nothing! I spend 45 minutes getting ready for work (which I don't have to do for two entire months since I'm on summer break now! woohoo!). I spend 45 minutes watching a recorded episode of Days of Our Lives (I speed through the commercials). I waste way more than 45 minutes of my day doing dumb stuff all the time. So why is it that I can't commit to spending 45 minutes of my day working out? That's all it takes.... 45 minutes... and I can't even do that. What's wrong with me?!?!

People have been asking me all week how I'm doing on my program. Well, it's time for me to come clean. I haven't even started yet. My first day was supposed to be last Sunday. As you know from my last blog entry, I was extremely hung over.

Excuse #1: I couldn't bend down long enough to pick up after my son let alone do an exercise workout. So I thought, maybe I should just start tomorrow.

Excuse #2: I wanted to start on Monday but I really wanted to stick to the schedule that I had laid out, which was to do my 6 days of workouts and have Saturdays off. So I waited.

Excuse #3: I also was afraid of being sore and still having to go to work. If I waited just one more week I wouldn't have to worry about that. So I waited.

Now here I am on Saturday, the day before I'm supposed to start (for real this time!) and running through my head are a ton of other reasons why I should wait or why I will fail. What is it about me that makes me think I will always fail at everything?! I'm pretty successful in life. I graduated high school with a high GPA. I went to college and got my BS is Elementary Education. (And no Dad, BS doesn't stand for Bull Shit degree... lol... Bachelor of Science. =) ) I have a career as a teacher. I went back to school and got a Masters in Technology in Education. I am able to support myself and my family. And I have an amazing son who lights up my world. I think I'm doing pretty well for myself. But when it comes to weight loss ... I don't know what it is that makes me doubt myself 100% of the time. There is this little voice inside my head that always tells me that I can't - that I'll fail. Well I'm done listening to that little voice! (I'm really not crazy and hearing voices.... really.... )

I'm done making excuses! I didn't start last week because I didn't want to. There, I said it! If I had really wanted to, I would have done it. I claim I never have time to workout, but I always make time to watch Days of Our Lives and repeats of Criminal Minds on A&E (my new favorite old show - so good!). Tomorrow, I AM starting my Power90 program! YAY ME!!

I filled out my calendar that came with the dvd's. It will help keep me on track and remind me that it's only 90 days! (Can you tell that I'm excited? LOL)

I took all my measurements so I have my "before" stats (which I'm NOT posting) and will be able to compare them at the end of the 90 days. I also took a bunch of "before" pictures. Here are a few...

These pictures are HORRIBLE! I'm doing this program so I never see this person in the mirror or in pictures again! I am at my peak weight right now. I know if I continue living my life how I'm living it now, I won't be living for as long as I'd like to be. (Tongue twister, I know, but I mean it!) I need to make a change, and it has to start NOW!

So, as of tomorrow, I will be believing in myself like so many others are believing in me (THANK YOU FOR BELIEVING IN ME!!!). No more excuses, no more voices telling me I can't, no more delaying the necessary. I'm in this for the long haul and that long haul starts tomorrow!

I believe.... (the children are our future, teach them well and let them lead the way...)

I believe... (in a thing called love, just listen to the rhythm of my heart...)

I believe... (ok, ok, enough song lyrics)... IN MYSELF!!

The Challenge Begins!

Today is the day! I'm starting the Power 90 program today!

One problem...

I am hungover like nobodies business. =( It probably wasn't a good idea to go out last night, but I had a great time. It was an emotional day for me yesterday (I moved into my parents house - temporarily I hope) so I needed to have some fun and let out some steam.

I went out with my buddies Evelyn and Candace. We went to a club called Plush. Plush is a nightclub for plus size women. A fat chick club. I wasn't too sure about it but we went to check it out. It started at 11pm and we got there at 11:15pm. There was hardly anyone there. We almost left to go to karaoke at Ellis Island Casino but we decided to stay for a little while to see if it would pick up. I'm so glad we stayed because we ended up having a TON of fun! (No pun intended... ton... plus size club... get it?! LOL) It was amazing to see so many overweight women in there not caring about their weigh or feeling self-concious. It was all about dancing and having fun. I will definitely go back there again.

Anyway... I'm not looking forward to my first workout because I think I may puke, not from the workout but from the hangover. Haa! So sad. I'm still going to do it, but I'm going to wait until later. Hopefully by then I'll feel better. I may take a nap too... that always seems to help me.

In the meantime, I still need to weigh and measure myself. I'd like to post my measurements but I don't think I'm ready for that. I also need to take my "before" pictures... which I'm going to do right now.

I'll post later, if I'm not too sick. lol.

I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For Ice Cream!

Today I've spent the day thinking about what I'm about to commit to. I'm still excited! I've decided to start the program on Sunday, after getting myself packed and moved on Friday and Saturday. If I start Sunday, that will give me 6 days of working out and Saturday will be my resting day. This should work out great for me since Saturdays are usually the busiest day of the week for me. I'm nervous about being sore and not being able to walk the next day at work, but at least it's the end of the year and all I'll be doing is reviewing for the final exam.

I'm also worried about being on summer break while doing this workout program, and over-eating junk food. I tend to have a better schedule and stick to it while I'm working. When I was doing the hcg diet, I did really well during the week because I had a structure - a system. I bought a programmable coffee maker so my morning coffee (breakfast on this diet) was ready when I woke up. I'd take my pills (appetite suppressant and blood pressure meds) on the way to work. I'd drink at least one bottle of water before my lunch break. I packed my lunch the night before so I made sure I had everything I needed. I'd drink one more bottle of water with lunch, and another before the end of the day. When I got home, I'd make dinner and was done for the day. The weekends are what killed me. No routine. No schedule. I'd wake up late, be rushing around town doing errands or visiting family, then end up stopping for fast food. I tend to gain weight during summer break cause I sit on my butt all day, eating and watching tv.

Well... that's not happening this summer. I have plans... big plans! On the days I have Dylan, we will be doing all sorts of things. I want to take him to Sea World, the Leid Discovery Children's Museum, swimming, play dates at the park, the Springs Preserve, camping... lots of places! This summer I'm staying active, watching what I eat, and not allowing myself to be tempted by fast food all the time!!

Oh... and no more ice cream...

Ok, well maybe I can have some ice cream every once in a while.... =)

When life hands you lemons....

...ask the bartender for a lime instead, then order a shot of tequilla.

Tonight has been rough, personally speaking. Not to get into too much detail on my weight loss blog, but... my husband and I are separating and I'm planning on moving out this weekend. This isn't anything that came out of nowhere. We have been separated since Spring Break in April but we have still been living together. Now we're at the point where we need to officially separate so the healing can start. Hopefully we can work through our issues and find our way back to each other. In the meantime, our son has to be our first priority.

So hard.

In tough times like these, I try to find something positive to throw my energy behind, hence the Power 90 and this blog. I got home from work today and look what I find sitting on the kitchen counter waiting for me...
My Power 90 DVD's are here! I was so excited to open the box and read everything!

It came with a Program Guide that tells you which part of the dvd you are supposed to do on which day. It talks about how you should start slow so you don't burn out in the first week and are in too much pain to continue the program, which is what I usually do. You are supposed to alternate the circuit dvd and the cardio/abs workout. So three days out of the week you are doing the circuit workout, gradually increasing through the levels. The other three days you are doing the cardio/abs workout, gradually increasing through the levels. That leaves one day a week to rest. I like the idea of having a 90 day calendar that lays out exactly what you should be doing on which day. I plan on taping it to my bedroom door or the wall next to my tv so I'm always staring at it. It also comes with a resistance band to use during the workout. It's not in the picture because Dylan stole it and was using it as a jump rope. lol.

My next step... weighing and measuring myself. I have to measure all the parts of my body: arms, legs, waist, bust. The works. And I must concur the dreaded scale. I also have to take my "before" pictures. Those are going to stay hidden from the world.

What I liked about this program is that is doesn't stress a super low calorie or crazy restrictive diet. It does come with a recipe book that includes some healthy meal options for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It talks about being healthy, eating healthy food, and noticing the difference you'll feel when you start working out and seeing results that will make you not want to put junk in your body anymore. It's all about the workouts. So if I want to have that occasional cocktail or glass of wine (or bottle of tequila... whatever), I can. It's all about moderation, which in the back of my mind I already knew.

With everything I have going on this week and my upcoming move, I don't think I'll be able to start the program until Sunday or Monday. I'm soooo looking forward to starting though! I just don't want to do the program for 2 days then have to stop for 2 days while I move and get my life back together.

In the meantime, I'll keep reading the informational material that was provided and I'll start filling out the 90 day calendar so I'm ready to start on Monday. Yay!